The Modern Mama

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Birth Story #2 Happy Birthday Neely!! December 30, 2010

‘Twas a few day after Christmas and all through the house not a creature was stirring not even the baby who is 4 days late inside of me now!

Tuesday afternoon December 29, 2009 I went to a scheduled Dr. appointment to have a non stress test because my baby bump was not removing itself on time. As I sat there hooked up to the machines listening and feeling my little gremlin wiggle and move inside of me I watched the monitors telling me I was having consistent contractions ever 10 minutes. The nurse re-enter the room to tell me the same observation of the results “wow! you’re not feeling this? it says you are having contractions every 10 minutes on the dot.” “no, not really I just have a little back pain but its bearable.” I said to her. This poor nurse insisted on having the Dr. come talk to me one last time before leaving the office, as she thought I may want to think about heading to the hospital soon. {HA!} And just as every Dr. I had seen for the last 2 weeks told me “you should go into labor at any time now!” and I thought to myself riiiiiight! So I hopped off the table and headed home to pass the time playing with my crazy 15 month old.

Hours have gone by

and nothing was happening. Josh had come home from work and we had eaten dinner… nothing. My mom {who is pretty much my unofficial doula} decided she wanted to spend the night JUST incase anything were to happen. We put Kelsey to bed one last time hoping that when she woke in the morning she would be a big sister. And the three of us proceeded to watch hilarious Youtube videos while I tried to bounce this baby out of me by  gently bouncing and rocking on a yoga ball. I was so tired and knew I should get a good nights rest incase anything did go down the following day. So about 11:30 I hopped into bed with my 75 pillows between my legs and snoozed of delivering this baby.


I’m up not only to pee for the 15th time but I’m having some serious rumbles in my tumbles. Real contractions had begun. You moms know the ones where you can’t sit still through them, and they are more than just a period cramp. I tried to stay in bed and just flip flop back and forth through them because I wasn’t ready to get up yet… not happening so I crept out to the living {where my mom was sleeping} to snatch the yoga ball and rock on that. Of course my mom spotted the staggering pregnant women attempting to be graceful at 3 am. I sat on the ball and talked to her for a few minutes and finally when another contraction struck she jumped off the sofa and whispered with glee “I’M GETTING READY!!!”.  I slowly got Josh up but wasn’t really in a rush. I continued laboring for hours and finally gave in to call our friend to come watch Kelsey for us and my Bradley girls to get their camera and video cams ready to go… We’re having a baby 🙂


We arrive at the hospital. On our way there Josh asked for my prediction of when the baby would be out by. Of course I was super optimistic and said he/she will be out by 8am! okay okay how about 10am I  agreed. When I got to the hospital I was only 6cm dilated, totally bummed and a little discouraged because I really felt I was farther than that. But that didn’t matter anymore now I was wrestling with the nurse between contractions that it wasn’t necessary for me to have an IV – I was very well hydrated!! I insisted that it wasn’t necessary, I had a baby a year ago with out one and was fine… come on people. After that ordeal I wobbled to our room {which happened to be the same room I delivered Kelsey in – so cool and motivating!} and began super-duper labor. This was way more intense than last stage labor with Kelsey. Thankful we had an excellent nurse who only did what we asked and after Josh explained very clearly to her that drugs were not an option we were good to go! My Bradley girls had arrived with cameras in hand and lots of positive energy I was all set. For the next almost 2 hours I labored off and on the yoga ball with the best birthing partner by my side helping me breath through every contraction {Joshy poo!} We can laugh about it now but while I was in the midst of several contractions back to back and I was forcefully throwing my entire body onto Josh as he knelt down in front of me massaging my back and coaching me he stands up at the end of a contraction to stretch out and says “man!, this is killing my knees.” I could feel the eyeballs rolling from the 3 moms behind me with a few snickers who have all had natural births and put their husbands through the same thing, it was so classic 🙂

I had hit that point where I was involuntarily pushing

I was so focused through all of my laboring I could hardly keep my eyes open. I had hit that final point and knew it was time to move so I could push. It was so uncomfortable moving at all but it had to be done, and still my water had not broken {this happened with Kelsey}. As I am getting on the bed I faintly hear the nurses say that the Dr. that was supposed to deliver {the same Dr. I saw the day before} had just gone into a surgery and was no longer available… here we go again I thought {I had some random Dr. with Kelsey also}. A few minutes went by which is like an eternity when you are in labor and the nurses are getting everything ready for delivery and all of a sudden a women comes running into the room. Have no fear it was a Dr. who ran from another building down the road because no one else was available to deliver. At this point I was so focused I hardly remember this but she introduced herself to me {I couldn’t tell you her name if my life depended on it} and congratulated Josh and I  then proceeded to ask me if we took hypnobirthing classes because I was so focused it was hard to believe there were no drugs involved and how rare it is to see a women labor so calmly and focused. I remember answering her “HA! no” and that was that 🙂 My water finally broke {on its own this time} and within minutes {3 pushes} we had another little GIRL 🙂
Neely Edyn was born 7lbs 9oz 21inches born at 10:02 am

Party of 4

A year later and Neely has grown so much and is sweeter than ever. Kelsey and Neely are like 2 peas in a pod, they are truly BFF’s and the Crocker clan couldn’t be happier 🙂


Pro’s of being a stay at home Mama October 5, 2010

My fun family at the beach!

I recently saw this quote

A friend had posted this on facebook and I thought it was so perfect for this post

“The homemaker has the ultimate career. All other careers exist for one purpose only, to support the ultimate career” – C S Lewis

For all stay at home mamas this better put a smile on your face, its a little pat on the back for all the hard work you do that seems to go unnoticed.

As a stay at home mama you are irreplaceable to your child{ren}

There is nothing better than the personal investment into your own child that will someday outlive you! You are the number one example for them as you live your life in front of them day by day.  It is wonderful to be able to teach your children what you want them to learn and at the rate you know they can learn it.

Now depending on how much money your income brings in most of the time it saves a family money to stay at home and raise the children instead of paying for a daycare or a nanny. Also paying for the commute to work, work clothes etc. If after paying for a daycare, commute and work clothes you are still bringing in a worth while income it comes down to priority. What are your priorities? Did you bring children into the world to have other people raise them for you? Although sometimes that sounds nice but that’s not how parenting and raising children was intended.

When there is a parent home to take care of the family and home the stress level in the house is reduced {there are always ‘those’ days though}. I know from a little bit of experience. After delivering Kelsey I took my six weeks off then returned back to my part-time job as the Deputy Town Clerk in our town to finish out the 2008 year {it was roughly 6 weeks I went back to work for}. Now our town hall is… we live next door so my commute was literally 5 seconds away. Even with that short of a commute it was still stressful to get out of the house on time, have Kelsey ready for an entire day away from home and hoping she had enough milk to last the day {for my fellow breastfeeding mamas that can be a challenge in and of itself}. Then having to pump while at work and hoping you are on the same feeding schedule as your baby. Not to mention having an idea of what dinner will be when you get home and keeping the house clean all on a few hours sleep… no thanks! That was seriously the most stressful and exhausting 6 weeks of my life!!

I am not saying that being a stay at home mama will solve all these issues immediately

And that they will never occur again because that’s just not realistic. But a flexible schedule makes things much easier for you, your child and the overall atmosphere of your home. Did you have a rough night with the baby? If you have a job to go to in the morning that baby needs to be up and ready to go by 7am no matter how much rest they got. {that sucks for you and your baby!}

What mom doesn’t want to witness all the firsts in their child’s life? Staying at home with your kids is more than just witnessing these milestones its about growing your children into the adults you want them to become. Building their character and preparing them for life. It would be great if you as the parent were the one to do that since you brought them into the world. The first few years of life are so crucial it is  important to have consistent and strong relationship with them.. Josh and I discussed the topic of to stay home or not to stay home before we ever had children. There really wasn’t much of a discussion the decision was that simple to make. We want to be the ones to raise our children not some random employee at a daycare that may not even be there in 3 weeks.

It makes me sad when I hear working moms say I’d never be a stay at home mom, my kids would drive me nuts and all stay at home moms do is spend their husbands money, never contributing to it. I know a women who has said that before! The jokes on her because she is missing out on a lot with her kids because of that attitude.

By the time she gets home at 5 or 6pm her kids are exhausted and cranky. The best part of their day was spent with someone else. As far as kids driving her nuts, yeah it happens but tomorrow is a new day and what better opportunity to grow as a loving parent. Kelsey gave Josh and I one of those opportunities today, she is great at it! And as far as spending all her husbands money… not always. Maybe the women she knows do that but most of the stay at home mamas I know are the most frugal people around! I guess its all about priority.

Here are a few wonderful milestones & memories I may have missed out on if I went to a job everyday.

* Teaching my children how to sit up, crawl, walk, run and skip
* Giggling with them in their cribs before nap time {Yes I did say in  their cribs, they are quit sturdy!!}
* Teaching Kelsey how to feed and be a great mommy to her babies by watching how I am with Neely
* Afternoon picnics at the park with our friends on a Tuesday because we can
* Reading and singing with my girls for however long they want and then they’ll singing back to me and read me stories
* I get to hear them giggle at one another in their cribs when they should be napping {but their laughs are totally worth it!}
* Teach them the importance of chores around the house {Kelsey assists with dishes, making beds, and picking up toys}

I am the one that gets to teach them all of these fun things! I am not saying that staying at home with your children is the only way to go, I have many friends who work full-time and part-time some because that’s what they want and others because their family needs that extra money. BUT if you have a choice in staying home with your kids or working what is your priority?


You know you’re a mama when… October 4, 2010

Filed under: Family,Friends,Moms,My mini me's — bethanyjcrocker @ 9:13 pm
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I was standing in my kitchen a few weeks ago chatting it up with a friend that has a son just about the same age as Kelsey, as we made our cups of tea we were laughing about the funny things our kids have been doing lately. Then she made a comment “you know you’re a mom when…” and I started dying laughing. So I hope you enjoy this post, I figured most moms would know where I am coming from 🙂

You know you’re a mama when…

You have to remove toys from the bath tub just to take a shower

If taking a long hot shower in peace and quiet is rare… VERY rare

Boogers and puke don’t really effect you any more

“Clean up! Clean up! everybody everywhere” becomes a part of your everyday vocabulary

Bags under your eyes are the everyday normal

You can change a diaper with your eyes closed

You have memorized every cartoon theme song under the sun

You shop for your kids more than yourself because its easier than trying on clothes

It takes more than 1 trip to the car to run a simple errand

Your breath magically turns into Lysol and a simple puff of your breath will clean anything off

All of the sudden your laundry triples thanks to burp clothes, diaper blowouts, grass stains… the list goes on

You don’t wear nice clothes often knowing that when you do the little ones will spill something on you

A simple little smile or giggle can turn a bad attitude around

You get up in the middle of the night to take care of a crying child and run into 4 toys on your way there

When wearing clothes that have spit up or other baby issued stains on your shoulder is no biggie

When you have become a taxi driver

When you have trouble finishing a thought or sentence because you’re distracted or just struck with MOM BRAIN!

As we all know the list could go on and on

What are some of your favorite “you know your a mama when…”?
It is a joy and an honor to be a mama and all these things listed above make me smile whether good or bad.

It’s good to be a mama 🙂


{Ding dong} who’s there? Oh ALICE! August 31, 2010

Filed under: Moms,shopping — bethanyjcrocker @ 5:45 pm
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The modern mama outsources!

Lets face it if money were no object we would outsource many daily grind responsibilities so we could spend more time doing things we love with people we love. I for one, would outsource my dishes {I am not blessed with a dishwasher, I AM the dishwasher} and folding laundry, how annoying it that! I may be weird but I enjoy grocery shopping. Maybe because I live near an amazing Wegmans and its more of an experience then a duty, who knows. But just because I enjoy it of course doesn’t mean its convenient to do with an almost 2 year old and 8 month old. By the time I find a parking spot semi near the cart return {I am weird like that} get the girls out of car and carry one in while I am playing defense to make sure the other doesn’t get run over by a car… well you guys get the picture, its a lot of work. For some it is super stressful and not enjoyable at all. I have a solution.

Cue the light bulb and music!

That’s why there is Alice! Alice has become this Modern Mamas BFF. The great thing about Alice is money is no object. Here is the low down on Alice. Alice is an online automated marketplace where you can create a running grocery list of items like toiletries, dish soap, diapers, wipes, cleaning supplies etc. Once you create your own account you are able to choose Your Products and decide how often you need that product.
For example I decided I want Gain laundry detergent in my shopping cart but I only need to restock on laundry detergent every 4 weeks, I select the product I want then I’d click every 4 weeks for the frequency of the product. Continue to do that for all the products you want to purchase. Alice will then send you an email when it is time to restock on laundry detergent. Once you receive that email you just hop on their website and go to the checkout with whatever other products you may need and Alice will ship your groceries to your house for… wait for it…  F R E E! Did you get that? For F R E E! No stipulations. It doesn’t matter how many massive bags of toilet paper and paper towels you buy plus 12 boxes of cheese itz, its all free. They also send you free samples of other products to try with every order {I enjoy them!}

Now because I have my automated Alice account with all of my dry goods I only have to go to the store for fresh food. I never need to make a last minute trip because we ran out of the dreaded toilet paper! It saves so much TIME, which as you know for every Mama time is precious. And it will save on gas due to not as many unnecessary trips to the store.


Now you can save time AND prevent tantrum from being thrown in aisle 5b because you did the majority of your shopping online and your little ones no longer have to occupy themselves by tossing every bright colored or cool textured box into your shopping cart. Its amazing the random things we’ve bought without knowing and found out later in our grocery bags once we got home. Kelsey is one sneaky little girl.

Just think all in a days work!

If you notice on the right hand side of this page you will see ‘Blogroll’ and there is a link under it When you click on that link it will bring you right to where you can save $10 on your first order. Go ahead and check it out. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain!

Happy shopping 🙂


Meet the Fam! August 24, 2010

Filed under: Family,Military,Moms,My mini me's — bethanyjcrocker @ 11:35 pm
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Josh (Papa or Dad) – a budding entrepreneur, and fellow blogger ( ) He is honestly the best father anyone could ask for! Our girls L O V E their Papa with all their hearts as they should, he is the most funny person I have ever met and they will ever meet in their life! Josh is also a Sergeant in the Army Reserves which causes him to travel multiple times throughout the year. Josh loves fitness and healthy living all while having a good time. Oh and he is super outdoorsy too. I am thankful to call him my best friend.

Kelsey (Jo Jo) – Kelsey is our oldest daughter that will be turning 2 the end of September. She continues to amaze both Josh and me daily. Currently she has a love for purses and shoes, this could be a very dangerous fetish in about 10 years. However she is a girl after my own heart! Kelsey is the perfect mix between a girly girl and a tomboy {her father is so thankful she is not a pansy}. If Kelsey had things her way she would be rolling around in a puddle with a pair of Mama’s high heels on. This spring my Mama bought Kelsey some flowers to plant at her house, she bought Kelsey impatience and she bought them for a reason! Kelsey knows what she wants and she wants it right now, a very strong willed little girl at her best.

Neely (Nee nee) – Little Neely is almost 8 months old. She has a growing personality that will only live up to true Crocker fashion, to be one of a kind! Her facial expressions are unbeatable. Like her big sister Neely is learning what she wants and when she wants it {NOW}. However Kelsey and Neely have the perfect relationship, Kelsey loves to entertain and Neely loves to be entertained. I am praying this relationship never changes and if so only for the better! Nee nee is working on her ability to crawl and stand firmly. Her latest milestone was saying “dadda” while pointing at Josh last night. I’m not sure who was more excited Josh or Neely?! Both our girls are famous for their lack of hair, if you had to choose little girls to be bald or SUPER blonde it would be them, they have the most perfectly shaped head {or so people at wegmans tell me all the time}.

Bethany (Mama) – I am the glue that holds this family together. Although Josh and I work as a team and a very good team for that matter there are just some things I must do, especially when Josh is gone on orders for the Army. All while keeping the house organized and clean I manage to have fun with everyone. Some days are definitely better than others but that is part of running a household. I love being with my family, they really are 3 of the funniest people I know with the best senses of humor. I am blessed!