The Modern Mama

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Confessions of the Modern Mama December 3, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — bethanyjcrocker @ 7:41 pm

Confession #1

We all have fuses and some of them are longer then others. Mine has been short lately {my poor family}. I always seem to get caught in the heat of a teachable moment with my darling daughters while in public. The majority of the time it is a pleasant teachable moment and others are not so pleasant. Recently my 2 year old has been testing how independent we will allow her to be. She loves to “help” but does not understand that some times are more appropriate to help then others. For instance I brought them out to a lunch date with a friend from college. I had Neely in a stroller and Kelsey wanted to help push her out of the restaurant which would normally be fine but it was very crowded and there were lots of cars coming in and out of the parking lot. So I took the stroller handle to help direct Kelsey and protect her from any cars in the parking lot. Well how dare I try to take over Kelsey’s responsibility of pushing her sister into on coming traffic?! What kind of mother am I?

Well after taking over the reins of the stroller and Kelsey having a complete meltdown because of it.  I put the breaks on the stroller and disciplined {spanked} Kelsey on the curb between the restaurant and the parking lot for yelling at me and being defiant against my instruction. Yes I spanked my child in public. As I lifted my head from handling the situation a man was sitting right in front of me watching everything {who knows how many people witnessed it from inside the restaurant?!}. He never said anything to me but had an intrigued look on his face. I thought about apologizing as I walked by him with my distraught child but then thought to myself I have no reason to apologize. This is the way my husband and I have decided is best to discipline our children.

I look at it like this – I often hear older people complaining about disrespectful and lazy teenagers, often they blame that on a lack of discipline. Then there is the other side where people find it abusive to spank your children in discipline.

We discipline our children because we love them and we want them to grow up to be respectful and respected children, teenagers, young adults and eventually adults! Children will be children and they will have their moments as everyone does. But I am the parent for a reason and they are children for a reason. We are here to teach, instruct, protect and nourish our children into a healthy adulthood. So I confess that I discipline my children in public but there is no way I regret it!


4 Responses to “Confessions of the Modern Mama”

  1. Jessie Smorol Dalton Says:

    Thank you for being honest about this haha it came at just the right time…I just got my weekly email from What to Except and it was about how if you spank you will have a violent, evil child who grows up to be the Unibomber. Hmm..As I recall, I got the occasional spank on the cheeks as a kid and I’m pretty sure I’m pretty normal and respectful lol…of course the spanking debate is a huuuge and I’m sure someone, some day will try to give you their two cents when Its none of their business, but what I really wanted to say is its nice to hear from a real life person on the subject of discipline because Portia’s just getting to the age where it is necessary, especially in public, but I’m still deciding what the best plan of attack is…

    • bjcrocker1 Says:

      Jess I totally know what you mean about the opinions of other people. All I can say is you know your child the best and you are the one ultimately responsible for them, so if they are behaving inappropriately its your job to take care of the situation. No one else will do it for you, they’ll only grumble about how wild and misbehaved they are! {don’t you love that!}

      Here’s is what Josh & I do about discipline… feel free to take it what a grain of salt! We discipline for the 3 D’s – Disobedience, Dishonesty, Disrespect. I could probably make an entire blog post just about that but just so you know that’s how we gage if it is a teaching or discipline situation. I am sure you are doing a great job, keep it up and stick to your guns {thats the hardest part I think!}

  2. Lauren (Auntie Beef) Says:

    I am doing the wave right now….the band is playing a up beat tone! I wished EVERY parent did that to their children, instead of just putting a smile on their faces and letting their children walk all over them! You guys are doing one AMAZING job on them! Keep up the good work!

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